We all have friends who are amazing at making plans and those who are just straight up flakes. The word ‘flaky’ has been round for years but I feel it has become a lot more popular in recently. I wanna talk about the types of friends I have when it comes to making plans and whether it’s okay to be flaky and why it is so much easier to be the flake nowadays.
The Always There Friend
These friends are the best at making plans. No matter what, if they can be there, they will. You can rely on them through anything whether you need cheering up, you’re bored or you just wanna party. However, this puts a lot of pressure on you to be there for them as much as possible and if you can’t you don’t want to piss them off. If they’re a good friend though, they will understand if you sometimes can’t be there as much as you’d like.
The Straight Up ‘Too Busy’ Friend
Whenever you ask in the group chat if anyone wants to do something they will always reply the same thing ‘Sorry, I’m busy’. Personally, I think you should always make time for your friends, especially the ones you haven’t seen in a while. So the busy excuse doesn’t really work for me every time. At least they’re straight up from the beginning and don’t dance around the fact they can’t or don’t want to do something.
FLAKY: Adjective: An unreliable person. A procrastinator. A careless or lazy person. Dishonest and doesn’t keep to their word. They’ll tell you they’re going to do one thing, and never do it. They’ll tell you that they’ll meet you somewhere, and show up an hour late or don’t show up at all. Also spelled “flakey”, or “flake” in the noun form.
These friends seem so excited about the plan over text then when it comes to the day they’ll say they can’t anymore, don’t feel up for it or will straight up ignore you. It’s so annoying when you make plans, get excited and then basically get let down that you wish they’d be more like the straight up too busy friend. Sometimes you really the need that friend to be there for you and it can put a massive strain on the friendship when they aren’t.
However, sometimes I think it’s okay to be flaky. There are times you really are looking forward to plans but are too tired, have too much work, or are suffering a mental health low when it comes to them. Pulling yourself out of bed and putting on a smile can be one of the biggest challenges but I find when I do, seeing my friend can make me feel a lot better.
The Far (Or Not So Far) Away Friend
They’re kind of like really good long distance relationships. No matter how far apart you are, you still make an effort to talk to each other and try see each other. And when you do it’s like no time has passed, you just might be more tanned or with another tattoo or piercing. You make lots of these friends when you’re at uni. The benefits are not only that you know you have a strong friendship that will probably last years but you get to travel and see different cities (or countries).
The Fizzle Out Friend
When you leave school/college you promise each other you’ll see each other and stay in contact. But.. . this just doesn’t happen You’ll message each other a couple of times to make plans but barely follow through. It then tends to be limited to birthdays and Instagram comments where the reply is ‘I miss you, its do something soon’, even though you don’t and you now you probably won’t. Then the only time you end up seeing each other is when you bump into each other in the street and it’s friendly but kind of awkward as you know you’ve grown apart.
The Aloof Friend
They’re in the group chat but they’re not really. You’re probably on mute and they only reply when they want something or remember to occasionally check. They will show up to group plans maybe one in ten times and when they do they bring a great energy to the group because you have so much to catch up on. They eventually become the fizzle out friend.
Low Maintenance Friends
Possibly the best type of friend. No pressure and no guilt. No matter how much time passes, it’s like nothing has changed. They’re understanding when you can’t always see them but when you do the conversation is natural and you find yourself catching up for hours. They’re easy with plans and are up for doing anything.